post one-shot
Aug. 23rd, 2022 04:26 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
notarealstateHawaii had reassured him that it wasn't 'a disaster', but the fact that they had to stop because it was too painful kind of made it so that now trying to face it again would be more...Well, intimidating for Rico, and possibily more frustrating for Hawaii himself though he'd never admit it.
Rico assumes that they will keep being friends and discuss what happened in a way that hopefully didn't make it worse. The tarot reading Rico gave himself said they were gonna be okay, so...
"Hello." Rico sits next to Hawaii at dinner. "How did the mission go?"
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Date: 2022-08-30 07:21 am (UTC)Rico chuckles as well, in a more self deprecating manner. He's not really good at anything, much less at sex of all things.
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Date: 2022-08-30 07:30 am (UTC)He hugs Rico, not caring anymore about trying to keep them as clean as possible. They both needed a shower anyway.
"You do learn fast. I can't wait to do this again"
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Date: 2022-08-30 07:37 am (UTC)He takes in a deep breath and then muses.
"Man, this place sucks, but at least we get to be together."
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Date: 2022-08-30 07:55 am (UTC)He leans in before Rico can even answer.
"I don't want to think about hiw bad this can go. Better to focus on hiw it's going right now"
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Date: 2022-08-30 08:06 am (UTC)"Yeah. You're right."
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Date: 2022-08-30 08:13 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-08-30 08:15 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2022-08-30 08:21 am (UTC)"It was a bit too much around the end, but nothing I can't handle"
He thinks about it for a bit.
"I wasn't expecting you to bite me"
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Date: 2022-08-30 08:55 am (UTC)He feels dumb in asking because he doesn't think Hawaii hasn't been fucked harder or by someone bigger, and he was prepared, so that's odd to hear.
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Date: 2022-08-30 09:02 am (UTC)"Last time i asked you to bite me, you just kinda.. Nibbled a bit? I don't know, I thought you found it weird or something" he shrugs.
Sure, things had changed ever since that time.
"mh" he pauses, "Should I keep my mind open for more stuff?"
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Date: 2022-08-30 09:04 am (UTC)He gets thoughtful at that last question.
"I...Guess? I don't know, you're the one that knows more about this stuff."
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Date: 2022-08-30 09:09 am (UTC)He guesses to be correct, in some measure.
"I'm not saying it's a bad thing, but seeing you take initiative is exciting. I like it, but I'm still afraid of making you uncomfortable, so... Those two ideas of you kind of clash"
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Date: 2022-08-30 09:24 am (UTC)He curls his mouth a bit.
"Sometimes people are aesthetically nice to me, like you would like a painting or a statue, but I never really look at someone and think that I wanna have sex with them? That's not the kind of attraction I feel."
He gets a bit sadder thinking about how sex is a forbidden topic, because in some way that does resonate.
"But yeah. Sex, regardless of attraction, is...Weird. I've always felt like it was an 'other people' thing, maybe because others seems to have a different relationship with...Well, everything, compared to me."
Man, is he going on a tangent now?
"...But I like doing it with you."
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Date: 2022-08-30 09:35 am (UTC)"For me things have always been straightforward. But I guess sex is more a matter of curiosity, almost?"
He never stopped to contemplate things under such light. He did feel attracted to people, sexually speaking, but what he felt for Rico was completely different.
"Like... I don't know, I wonder what people look like naked a lot, just to name one. And if I like that image it's not that hard to start wondering how they're in bed. I like to try nee things because I always want to know how it feels. Are you really telling me you've never wondered how it would feel to have sex with anyone?"
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Date: 2022-08-30 09:41 am (UTC)He gets very embarrassed all of a sudden as if he Hawaii didn't just have sex.
"I did it thinking of you, sometimes..."
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Date: 2022-08-30 09:50 am (UTC)So he begins with a gentle squeeze, while also stroking Rico's back to let him know he's okay with that.
"I mean... I didn't even know you masturbated until I saw you doing it" he admits too.
"And now you tell me this after we..." he doesn't finish, saying out loud would ruin the mood.
He's starting to feel warm and fuzzy, as well as sleepy.
"I mean... There's so much of you I have to understand. And I'm fine with that. It makes you even more special" he smiles, and brushes some hair away from Rico's face.
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Date: 2022-08-30 09:55 am (UTC)He laughs awkwardly.
"I don't like being special. I'd rather be like everyone else."
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Date: 2022-08-30 10:01 am (UTC)Does this sound bad?
"Like, I mean, I get what you're trying to say. But I've never felt like this for anyone else, and I'm afraid that saying you're like them means you'll just get tired of me, eventually"
He sighs.
"I know you're not like that, but... I told you, a lot of people had sex with me just as an experiment, and I was fine with that because I didn't feel this way toward them. Sometimes I think I could be nothing more than an experiment to you too, and although I know that isn't true, it bothers me"
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Date: 2022-08-30 10:09 am (UTC)"Oh. Really?"
He sighs.
"Look, I cannot guarantee you anything about sex, this is too new for me to, I don't know, make a long term statement, but it's not for sex that I like you. We've always been close, and I can tell you anything, and it's like-- even if you don't understand, you listen and that...That means a lot. I'm sure there is someone like me out there, but I like to think that I can get to talk to people, actual normal people rather than a mirror of myself, and be okay too with a bit of work. I mean, what's the point of life if you're only supposed to get along with those that are identical to you? And you and I get along even if we're opposites and that's nice."
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Date: 2022-08-30 10:17 am (UTC)He nods, and kisses him again.
"I too feel like sex isn't the point of it"
He's hesitant, now. He looks at Rico, then lowers his gaze as he grabs his hand,and cuddles up against his chest.
"I love you" he says.
It shouldn't be that big of a deal by now, but Hawaii still feels like it is.
It's meaningful, and for the first time he feels safe enough to say that without messing up, or making things complicated.
Plus,it feels nice getting this off of his chest.
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Date: 2022-08-31 01:08 pm (UTC)"I love you too!"
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Date: 2022-08-31 03:45 pm (UTC)"We should get a shower" he mumbles.
For a moment he almost feels like suggesting a second round, but his ass is sore and he's tired.
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Date: 2022-09-21 07:12 pm (UTC)Rico agrees but he doesn't act like it, simply snuggling against Hawaii and clearly ready to fall asleep.
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Date: 2022-09-21 07:15 pm (UTC)He giggles, but doesn't want to move either. He pats his back, then kisses his cheek.
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Date: 2022-09-21 07:19 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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